Why being a Pastor's wife is hard....
9:42 PMAnd, since this is MY blog, I can write some of these reasons out, without feeling awful. I will not feel bad that this is the way I feel, and I will not end the post with a soft and lovely sentiment. This is how I feel...period.....(really, this post isn't that bad at all....I sure made it sound like this was going to be a venting session, didn't I? gol, I'm so dramatic.... :))
- My husband is able to be reached for anything concerning the church, at all hours of the day. If there is any issue with the church, he is called. Whether is be a technical problem, a church member problem, or even if the air conditioner isn't working...he is called...we are a small church.
- Since my husband is the Pastor, if any un-foreseen events happen in the church body, it can abruptly cancel any trips that we would have planned.
- I am a single parent on Sunday mornings. My husband is gone by 8am. I have to get myself and the girls ready, which is not fun...at all! When at church, my husband can't be a father because he is "at work". Therefore, I have to watch the girls and be in charge of them every Sunday morning.
- I have to sit by myself (when I'm not doing nursery, that is)
- I have to listen to my husband speak for 30 minutes without being able to interrupt him.
- My husband is always thinking about church. He is always reading for either his own personal growth, or the next sermon. In all of his free time, he is consumed with what he needs to be doing to prepare for church.
- We can never just "quit" a job. There is the whole "calling" that has to be felt. My husband has to feel like he is being "called" to a new church before we would ever leave. So, when I tell my husband that I would LOVE to move closer to my parents...this can't just happen easily, and it has been a hard reality to accept. A lot of steps have to take place, and there is a "divine" intervention that needs to take place.
- He doesn't have the normal 8-5 job. He is gone most evenings, and him coming home "early" is if he comes home by 7 pm. This is one (of the many) reasons I don't cook. He is rarely home at a time where he can take the girls so I can even make something. The girls and I are basically on our own most days....
Ya know how when your husband is obsessed with something, how it gets so super annoying because it's all he talks about, and that the last thing you want to do is jump on board with him and enjoy it too? I felt like this years ago when the movie Gladiator came out. It was all PG could talk about. He got the CD, he was waiting for the DVD to come out, and he would just talk about it all-the-time. It got rather annoying, and it became this thing where I despised him even talking about it, because it was this annoying obsession....
dare I say that this is the way that I can tend to feel towards church sometimes? PG is so wrapped up in church, in theology, in meetings, in John Piper...it can feel like he is obsessed with "church". It consumes him, it takes up all of this free time, and church is what takes him away from his family. Now, by no means do I despise church...that would be a problem, wouldn't it? All I'm saying, is that as the wife of a pastor, it is something that I am daily struggling with. This is the biggest struggle right now, and I need to be honest with it....
Whew...I feel better....
Can I get an 'amen?
and, on a lighter note.....I am LOVING gummy worms right now!
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